The Little Things

I miss the little things.

I miss the hand holding. I miss the nervous energy that is there when sitting next to the person you have feelings for. I miss that warmth that is there from loving that person. I miss that companionship and knowing a person is there like that. Once you really fall for someone like that...

It is so hard to forget. I don't want to have these feelings. But at one point, I let him into every aspect of my life. No one had ever seen every aspect of my life. I showed my relationship with Christ and my family. I have memories in so many places with him.

I sometimes think I am going to stop feeling lonely or stop wanting for a relationship. But once you let a person into every aspect of life... It is hard to push them out of it.

I wish sometimes to forget, but then I remember what he taught me about myself. I remember what he taught me about my relationship with God.

I know some people are okay to be alone... but at some point... I realized that I am meant to share my life with someone. I know I have a soul mate somewhere... I just don't know where or when I will meet him.

Here's to more hope of letting go and realizing the role he played in this configuration.